My Polish neighbours

“Nigdy w życiu” – never in your life!

So, when I knocked on my two most immediate neighbours’ doors back in 2020, I ventured into uncharted “never in my life” territory.

Mr Cough

First door on the left in Gdańsk – Mr Cough. So-called because his coughing can be heard through walls, several streets away, even on the other side of the city.

I don’t want to criticise Mr Cough too much. He always looked like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. Goodness knows what he’s been through. He has a daughter. However, Mr Cough and the daughter’s mother are not together. She turned up at the flat from time to time to scream at him.

Still, there are no excuses for his despicable don’t-love-thy-neighbour behaviour. One time, as my wife and I were locking up our flat, Mr Cough began to climb the stairs near the lift. No doubt he saw us in the mirror on the wall just outside our flat. Amazingly, he continued to climb the stairs to make sure he would avoid us altogether. Perhaps he ended up on the roof.

I must have seen Mr Cough twenty times around our estate. He pretended not to see me every single time. 

I don’t know Mr Cough’s name. 

But I bet he knows mine somehow. As Leah wrote:

A little distrust of your neighbours is healthy in Poland because somehow they know everything about you even though you’ve never told them.

A fair bit happened at the start of 2024. I put pressure on Mr Cough to change his ways a bit:

Count 1: The play sessions Mr Cough conducted with his daughter became frustratingly noisy. Therefore, I stuck two threatening notes on his door which referred to noise ordinance laws. Pleasingly, his wife saw the second letter and proceeded to knock on the doors of the potential grumbler. “Sorry, miss, I don’t know Polish”. She was furious. I think Mr Cough was refused access to the child for half a year.

Count 2: He hums. The smell from his flat radiates into the corridor and beyond.

Count 3: He slams the front door in the early hours of the morning.

Count 4: He sometimes did the vacuuming in the early hours of the morning. I mean at around 3 a.m.

Moody Mariusz and The Masters of Avoidance

First door on the right – Moody Mariusz, as I used to call him. I remember the first time I met Moody Mariusz when I foolishly knocked on his door to introduce myself. Anyway, he opened the door and greeted me with a grunt and look of horror on his face. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: Hi! Nice to meet you. I’m your new neighbour 

Moody Mariusz: Yeah

Me: Well, just to introduce myself

Moody Mariusz: OK, do widzenia

Me: Yeah, all right mate. You’re a good one you are, ain’t ya? Bye

Phew! 

Some people are just shy and withdrawn. However, there are no excuses for not being able to adhere to “thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself”.

And all those half-hearted “Dzień Dobry” greetings he kept mumbling when I saw him might as well have been “Get out of my sight”.

As for Moody Mariusz’s wife, she admirably mastered the art of pretending not to notice my wife and me when she walked (ghosted) past us on the street.

In March 2024, I approached Moody Mariusz when I saw him in the butcher’s. I asked him to stop closing the door in the corridor due to the smell emanating from Mr Cough’s flat. To my surprise, he was quite friendly and polite. He seemed to be keen on supporting me in my war against Mr Cough as well. 

And so it went that I gained the trust of Moody Mariusz with our anti-Mr Cough conversation. He even started to greet me with a hearty “Hej” or “Cześć” instead of “Dzień Dobry”.

Mrs Suspicious and the initial friendliness which turned into indifference

In my first few days in my flat in Gdańsk, I ran into a lady who lived on the same floor as me, albeit right at the other end of the building.

She asked me whether we’d just moved in and told me I could count on her should we need any help.

Several days later, I knocked on her door to ask some questions regarding the building administration company. When she opened the door, she looked at me as if I were a complete stranger.

What happened? Good intentions soon turned into jealousy? Perhaps she found out that I had two parking spaces and she only had one or something because she was incredibly suspicious of me the second time we exchanged words.

They’re so Friendly in Łódź

Updating this post in May 2025, I’ve now lived in my rented flat in Łódź for over four months. I have nothing but positive things to say about my nearest and dearest neighbours.

The couple which lives next door are very polite. Indeed, the male half usually belts out a hearty “hi” when he sees me and occasionally shakes my hand. He has also offered to help me with anything I need and even solved an issue I had with my car when he saw me struggling with something in the underground garage.

As for the other set of neighbours on my floor (there are only two sets), I’ve only seen the lady of the house and she is always very cheerful and polite.

Do Polish neighbours show any concern in times of trouble?

Back in October 2022, my flat in Gdańsk flooded for reasons I’d rather not go into.

Being the responsible and thoughtful individual I am, I informed the people directly below me as well as Moody Mariusz’s wife. 

A day or two after informing the couple below me, the male half, who looks like a bulldog, completely blanked me on the street. 

Come on man! Where’s the empathy?

My Polish neighbours – Ill-mannered but ok

Leah Morawiec wrote a cracking post about jealousy in Poland.

There seemed to be a great deal of jealousy in the air where I lived in Gdańsk. And not just jealousy. Suspicion and ignorance too. Was Moody Mariusz initially so avoidant of me because he was jealous of the fact that he had 20 less square metres of property to his name?

All in all, it’d be really controversial to tar an entire nation with the same brush. I’ve found out in recent months that nice and respectful Polish neighbours do exist.